When I started skateboarding, I got the opportunity to go to London to learn English. At that time my father was very much against skateboarding because my village people were bad mouthing about me. My father felt very uncomfortable these days – he didn’t listen to me and my part of the story – he simply told me: “Asha, please stop going to the skatepark! I can’t allow you to go London.” Back then, he was also drinking a lot. And whenever he was drunk, he was out of his mind.
I asked him: “Why? I’ve got this huge opportunity, why can’t I go Dad?” He answered: “Have you ever heard what the villagers are talking? They are speaking very, very bad about you!” This made m feel very bad. And I became shy. I didn’t had any kind of access to him. Sometime he was beating me and my mum. That was a horrible time.
I decided to stop asking him about London but I didn’t stop skateboarding. Time was passing by and I was waiting for my chance, for a good time to talk to him again! I needed a moment where he wasn’t drunk.
Meanwhile many people came to my parents and supported the idea of letting me go to London. His mind didn’t change though. Ulrike talked to him and also to my mother, Ulrike even got my school teachers to talk to them and make them understand why I was selected and why it was important for me to go to London. It was my entry card to learn more and move forward in my life. But still, they said no!
One day I took my chance. I asked my mother and my father: “Mom and Dad, have you ever seen me doing anything wrong? Have you ever seen me doing the things the villagers are telling you?” They said no! Yet they took the gossip of the villagers over my actions. This was hurting me. I was desperate. I asked: “How can you say that this is not good if you do not even know about the things they are talking?” I challenged them further: “Are you trusting other people more than your own daughter? Why? Please give me at least ONE CHANCE and see! If I do anything wrong, if I bring shame over our family then you can stop me and explain me what I did wrong and why this is no good.”
Over and over again I asked them: “Can you please trust me? Only once!” I wasn’t willing to give up. I wanted this opportunity so much!
And then FINALLY – after one year of endless questions and no answers – my mom said: “Asha, you can go if you want to. But stay strong, honest and do not let people down who are trusting you! I’ll talk with your dad, don’t worry!”
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. My mom!
And she did it! She talked with my father and he finally agreed! Both of my parents told me something very important: “Give always your best, Asha! Learn and work hard so that we can show the people who are trying to put us down the fruits of your work and learning.”
Today, my father is very proud of me and telling everyone with pride: “Yes, Asha is my daughter!”
I can enjoy my very own freedom and I can live my life how I want to live it! He has full trust in me! My father has stopped drinking and he is no longer beating us – he is now a good father to me, and a good husband to my mother. We all are now living a happy life together in love!
I want to say to all the people out there: “Please do not let the girls down! Let them live their own lives! Allow them to go out of their houses and let them work! TRUST them! And teach them to trust themselves! Our society will be a better society if the girls are as free as the boys!”
4 thoughts to “My family life has changed”
U r very strong girl..In the very short time u got a great achievement
So its a great proud moment for our all girl..One who belong from rural areas ..
Nd the most important my ideas are
The district administration have should be take a action for ur great achievement..The district administration can promote to u the program of
“बेटी बचाओ अभियान”
Regards:- shiv kumar vishwakarma
Nd sorry for any errors ..
But u r great.
Thank you so much and your ideas are great.
Aap hamesha aaise hi aage badte rho…